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mers_worm
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Name: Marian
Birthday: 12/7/1986
Gender: Female
Interests: Right now: eating lunch. Most other days: books, dimples, corduroy pants, writing, ink splotches, camels, art, interesting people, music, beauty, the ocean, travel, sunrise...and all that ties up to mean that I'm interested in God.
Expertise: editing papers, running over stop signs, making discoveries
Occupation: Student
Message: message meEmail: email me
MSN: mers_worm@yahoo.com
Yahoo:  mers_worm@yahoo.com
Member Since:
2/7/2005
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| I went outside for a walk today because I was in need of fresh air and sunlight, both of which are available on base for free. I decided to be risky and go off the beaten track a bit, venturing onto the walking trails which wound through the scrubby Texas bush. The sky was so unbelievably blue today that I have trouble even describing it, and I bounced along in my red t-shirt, thoroughly enjoying freedom and life.
On my way I realized two things, first of all, how easy it is to be negative merely because one is too lazy to find things to be positive about, and two, that something of Texas has seeped into my blood after all. When I first arrived here almost all I heard about was how this base was the least of the least of the least (sir). And while I, in my own way, found enough to enjoy (a view is good enough for me), I wasn't letting life surprise me. Today, I think I did that. I met a little slithery snake who slipped off into the underbrush before I had a chance to say hello, and I chased a marigold origami butterfly who disappeared before I arrived at our meeting point, and it was lovely. Surprises usually are, I find. And somewhere along the way, I caught my breath and found myself deliriously happy for no other reason than that life is good, God is good, and I'm at home, even here.
About part two, I found that those first crucial months of life in the deserts of El Paso must have left an impression after all, for I find myself oddly enamored with the craggy hills jutting out around base, the oddly twisted trees, the white-pink rocks, the cacti that line the road, and the Texas blue sky that always comes with at least a bit of breeze. It is becoming my Texas, just as it was my Tennessee and my Virginia and my England and my Indonesia, if only for the fact that I have lived here and loved here and found that it is good.
And as I was walking back beneath the tree branches (because sidewalks are over rated and the grass is dead here anyway), my mind was teeming with all these thoughts, and it came to me that it just must be good writing weather. | | |
| First stanza: There is sunshine coming over the desert green hills and a weathered blue sky above, dry sun, not ocean wet like the one we have at home, but friendly. Colombian coffee waits for me, and English muffins. I travel for breakfast.
Lee speaks of citrus deserts, but this is far from it. There is no lemon in the air. But perhaps cilantro. I'm not quite sure.
Second stanza: Blue sheets to remind me of the sea, blue grey almost like the English Channel. Greens, browns, whites for my Sunda Straights. I'm at home here, perhaps the sun-green quilt over the arm chair helps and the books that take me anywhere in the world and still leave me Right Here when my Josh walks through the door with his dimple-grin ready for me.
The last two days have been fog and rain, an odd turning of Texas to the top of Tangkuban Perahu, shrouded in mist, oddly twisted trees poking through the grassless sand.
Third stanza: Time is a haze of typing, drawing, putting myself out there, drawing myself back in, hiding in books, surprising myself with writing, flipping through pictures of a new life, Josh at home and happy, frozen custard (of course), and finding someone else's words to connect with my heart. Interesting.
All this and the flowers on the window sill never die. Flowers from him: vibrant purples, yellows, greens, stand straight and proud, faces outward to the world. A proclamation of sorts? | | |
| I write a birthday poem for my mom every year. October 25th and an email goes out into cyberspace complete with some purposefully bad rhymes and a lot of heart. Frankly, I don't remember when I started this tradition. I have a vague memory of a coloured pencil card around fourth grade that rhymed "mom" with "bomb" (start imagining a birthday poem that includes the word "bomb" and go from there). I started telling one of my best friends about the Birthday Poem tonight (since I was writing another one--year 55--Happy Birthday, Mom). I ended up sending her a few of the past Poems I could find in my Sent Items, and we had a good laugh together about them. She thinks I should put them in a book an illustrate them. And then make a sequel with poems for Dad. We're working on titles already. Think New York Times Best Seller List.
In other pertinent news, I just got back from visiting Amanda (see the copious amounts of photos--ridiculous), which was amazing, to say the least. And now I'm back with wide-eyed one year olds while planning out writing work for the next two months. I have my own desk now (kind of) where I hole up with stacks of books and my laptop and feel perfectly content for four hours to be reading and writing and using what was coming too close to being a stagnant mind. I couldn't do a cubicle if there was no escape into a bigger world through words. Meanwhile, outside, the sun is faking me out, and I'm just getting increasingly cold and already becoming the butt of jokes. I can't help it that I freeze in the winter, people!
But it's already tomorrow somehow. 'Twas brilig, and the slithy toves / Did gyre and gimble in the wabe: / All mimsy were the borogroves, / And the mome raths outgrabe. And the stars are too cold to come out, so I have to go to sleep by myself beneath three blankets, wishing that I'd had someone to share a cup of tea with me before bed. That's all. | | |
| It's 3.40am, and there's a storm rolling in. I'm listening to England music and missing that part of my life while finding new excitements in Virginia and looking forward to eight months from now. It's been a compulsively creative night with Seamus (the Mac) and Tomas (the flute), my sketchbook, a pile of CDs, and flashes of real live lightning. So...
Here's to Bollywood and stolen pizza, day long hunts for The Breakfast Club, sweet pepper hair dye, stolen phone calls, really bad romance novels and Little Manhattan, being home and being alone, being awake at this pristine time of the day, sketching feet and planning the little details, batik prints and kecapi suling, dreaming big and little, praying hard and fast, loving patient, washing the dishes, waterfalls of music, new journals of wisdom, going to bed perhaps? Here's to all of that and more. And maybe, if you're reading this, here's to you. | | |
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Josh and I (Marian) were sitting watching the Olympics and being completely lazy Sunday. We felt like we deserved it. After all, we got engaged this weekend, and that's hard work! We thought that this event should be commemorated by a blog, one written by both of us. So yeah. We're getting married. And we're pretty stoked about it. We can use the word "stoked" because we spent all day on the beach Saturday which makes us almost as cool as surfers.
Here's the story:
11.00pm on 8/08/08: I go to bed, planning on getting up the next morning to go to DC
2.30am on 9/08/08 (I do dates the Asian way): Josh calls. I pick up to groggilyask him how work was. He informs me that it was good and then tells me that I need to get dressed for the beach because he's right outside the house. My reaction? Extreme surprise. I run to the window as he calmly informs me again that we're going to the beach. And the inspirational words that came out of my mouth at the moment? "But I haven't shaved!" So, I left Josh in the car while I showered. I'm that thoughtful.
5.15am: we arrive at VA beach, spread out a blanket on the cold sand, and watch a rim of orange spreading across the horizon
5.45am: I see something black in the surf. Thinking it was a large bird flapping through the waves, I stand up to see what it is. Dolphins! An entire pod of dolphins was playing just 20 feet off shore. We go down to get a closer look
6.00am: Josh goes to get the camera so that he can unsuccessfully photograph our dolphin escapade. We did not get ANY dolphin photos. Josh's camera skills are lacking. But there really were dolphins. We promise. And the sun continues to rise.
6.17am: The sun is just peaking over the clouds (Josh has spent the last few minutes telling random backpacking stories), and Josh tells me to turn around to look at the cloud bank behind us that's reflecting the sunrise. It's really quite lovely. When I turn back around, he's kneeling on one knee with an emerald ring in his hand saying, "Marian Stillman, will you marry me?"
6.18am: after several moments of shock (I thought this wasn't going to happen for a while!), I say, "yes!"
Here's Josh's version of the story (it's not as true as mine) (Don't listen to Marian...my version is very true):
2345 20080808: Marian is expecting a phone call from me when I get off because she had asked to call and make sure my evening went alright (it was crazy). So, at 2345, I am headed home to change, get the ring, and hit the road to drive to Richmond. I call when she is on her way to bed, and I explain that I had dropped my side
arm off, I was going to get supper, and I would call around 0300 (all true), however, she had no clue that I was fixing to be on my way to see her.
0030 20080809: I am showered, packed, and nervous. I have been calm all day/evening, but when I got in the car, the nerves hit. I start heading toward Richmond, and I make random phone calls to friends to stay awake/calm the nerves.
0215: I arrive in the subdivision where Marian lives, and I park. I try to decide if I should nap for a few minutes or call. Needless to say, I chose to call. I pull up in front of the house, and I call. Marian answers, and she groggily asks how work was, etc. I tell her fine, but I tell her I need her to get dressed because I am in front of her house and ready to take her to the beach. Her reaction, "I have to shave." So, she goes to shower (I calmly told her to), and my nerves hit the roof having to wait for like twenty minutes...outside in the car, I might add.
0515: We arrive at Virginia beach. The sky is still black, but the orange is faintly showing across the ocean. We put out a blanket, sit down, and began to watch the sky change colors.
0545: Marian stands up, and she says she sees something on the edge of the surf. As she gets up, she says she thinks she sees dolphins. Sure enough, we walk up to the surf, and we see a whole school (also known as a pod) of dolphins. We begin to watch, and I tell her to wait while I go to retrieve the camera AND the ring. I come back, and I proceed to get a ton of empty ocean photographs with a whole lot of water, but the dolphins cannot be seen...In my defense to being able to take no pictures of the dolphins --- they are very, very quick.
0600: The sun is starting to rise, the colors are beginning to peak, and the people are starting to gather. I begin to wait for the right time...what is the right time? When the sun peaks above the clouds. As I wait, I woooo her with backpacking stories (how romantic, right?). As I wait, I look back, and I see some cloud banks behind us reflecting the sun.
0617: I tell her to turn around and look at the cloud bank. As she does, I get down on one knee, tap her on the back, and she turns around. I hold up the ring, grab her hand, and I ask, "Marian Stillman, will you marry me?"
0618: I wait for the shock to exit her face, and her ability to speak to return. She says "YES!!" (in case you wonder), and I place the ring on her finger. The rest is just details...
Marian again. So yeah, pretty much a completely awesome day. And we think we're pretty cute. And romantic. Yay!
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